Tonight I had high hopes for sleeping, but once again, I'm up. I made the mistake of reaching behind me to pull my pillow into place and felt like my shoulder was wrenched out of place. So now I'm trolling the Internet reading the news. The biggest news is that my Source of Snark for the last week or so, Representative Anthony Weiner of New York, resigned. Mr. Weiner has been an absolute blessing in my life (did I mention that before?) because really, with a name like that, it was almost predestined. He has provided much entertainment over the last week. I think it was rude of him to suddenly grow a conscience and quit. I'm going to have to find something else to parlay into what passes for entertainment. I think my parting shot should be shared. To the people who were enjoying so many jokes at his expense, I tweeted "I think you need to give him a break. He is probably an upstanding citizen who is feeling very deflated right now. I think you need to give him time to rise above it." Took two tweets, but it was a fitting burial.
Yesterday I swallowed my pride and allowed someone to come into my house and scrape off the top layer of scum in the kitchen. It was a blessing and a total humiliation. The woman who came was very sweet, but I wonder if she left thinking no one should have been eating in there for the last six months. I can tell you. It wasn't six months--only four. The only room in the house that is spotless all the time is the bathroom. I keep that pristine. Mostly because I spend so much time in there and I am not emptying the contents of my stomach into something that makes me want to hurl further. This means I have had to ban my son from my bathroom. The problem is boys aren't too specific. They figure as long as they hit something, they are doing fine.
I received a wonderful surprise package in the mail from a friend who sent all kinds of little odds and ends with cute notes attached to them. In the box was a hat to cover my head. I had occasion to wear it today because another full chunk of hair came out in the shower. I covered up with the hat and went to the psychiatrist anyway. (The psychiatrist is not for me. It is for my special needs kids. However, I have had occasion to think that perhaps we are medicating the wrong person.) I have never, not once in my entire life, gone out in public in a hat. I am not a hat person. Hat people have style and flair and a thin face. My face as a usual course is as wide as it is tall and has been blessed with several chins in case the first one doesn't work out. Then the meds have turned it into an advertisement for a solar eclipse. As for style and flair, the only style I have is at least five years old and flairs because its completely stretched out and the elastic is shot. But I put that hat on and went. And my sainted husband told me I looked cute. That reminds me--I need to make an appointment for him at the optometrist.
The pneumonia continues to haunt me. I figured that since the antibiotics ran out a week ago, the pneumonia should have too. However, it may have taken up permanent residence in my body. My lungs are producing enough mucous to drown a horse. The down side may be that its the MCTD increasing its hold on my lungs and not the pneumonia at all. The plus side of this is that I'm going to learn to spit a loogie like the cool high school football guys do on all the sidewalks.
I also discovered something that I'm not sure I want to know more about. I was playing word games with the kids in the car today and Shoshi pronounced one of wise statements ("Seriously, Jakob?! I'm totally sure you didn't know that Hannah Montana wasn't real. Really she's just wearing a wig and she was just PLAYING at being Hannah Montana so people would leave her alone.") I started laughing and glanced in the rear view mirror. And only half of my smile goes up. One side of my face is just kind of...smirking. I have had a lot of numbness on that side, but I have chalked it up to the same thing that makes my arms and legs go to sleep all the time (highly annoying--takes less than a minute and it is painful--something new and different). My mouth and face gets numb on the right side. Now its not paralyzed, but it definitely is lopsided. So this really bothers me. I have practiced over and over again trying to learn to raise one eyebrow. That is just such a COOL Mom trick!! Now I realize that my face has decided to cooperate, but in the wrong place. Just once I wish I could get it all right. I'm supposed to raise the eyebrow, lose weight in my butt and thighs (and not in the breastal area), and sleep at night. Instead everything is sliding--my mouth, my boobs and my loogies.
Yesterday I swallowed my pride and allowed someone to come into my house and scrape off the top layer of scum in the kitchen. It was a blessing and a total humiliation. The woman who came was very sweet, but I wonder if she left thinking no one should have been eating in there for the last six months. I can tell you. It wasn't six months--only four. The only room in the house that is spotless all the time is the bathroom. I keep that pristine. Mostly because I spend so much time in there and I am not emptying the contents of my stomach into something that makes me want to hurl further. This means I have had to ban my son from my bathroom. The problem is boys aren't too specific. They figure as long as they hit something, they are doing fine.
I received a wonderful surprise package in the mail from a friend who sent all kinds of little odds and ends with cute notes attached to them. In the box was a hat to cover my head. I had occasion to wear it today because another full chunk of hair came out in the shower. I covered up with the hat and went to the psychiatrist anyway. (The psychiatrist is not for me. It is for my special needs kids. However, I have had occasion to think that perhaps we are medicating the wrong person.) I have never, not once in my entire life, gone out in public in a hat. I am not a hat person. Hat people have style and flair and a thin face. My face as a usual course is as wide as it is tall and has been blessed with several chins in case the first one doesn't work out. Then the meds have turned it into an advertisement for a solar eclipse. As for style and flair, the only style I have is at least five years old and flairs because its completely stretched out and the elastic is shot. But I put that hat on and went. And my sainted husband told me I looked cute. That reminds me--I need to make an appointment for him at the optometrist.
The pneumonia continues to haunt me. I figured that since the antibiotics ran out a week ago, the pneumonia should have too. However, it may have taken up permanent residence in my body. My lungs are producing enough mucous to drown a horse. The down side may be that its the MCTD increasing its hold on my lungs and not the pneumonia at all. The plus side of this is that I'm going to learn to spit a loogie like the cool high school football guys do on all the sidewalks.
I also discovered something that I'm not sure I want to know more about. I was playing word games with the kids in the car today and Shoshi pronounced one of wise statements ("Seriously, Jakob?! I'm totally sure you didn't know that Hannah Montana wasn't real. Really she's just wearing a wig and she was just PLAYING at being Hannah Montana so people would leave her alone.") I started laughing and glanced in the rear view mirror. And only half of my smile goes up. One side of my face is just kind of...smirking. I have had a lot of numbness on that side, but I have chalked it up to the same thing that makes my arms and legs go to sleep all the time (highly annoying--takes less than a minute and it is painful--something new and different). My mouth and face gets numb on the right side. Now its not paralyzed, but it definitely is lopsided. So this really bothers me. I have practiced over and over again trying to learn to raise one eyebrow. That is just such a COOL Mom trick!! Now I realize that my face has decided to cooperate, but in the wrong place. Just once I wish I could get it all right. I'm supposed to raise the eyebrow, lose weight in my butt and thighs (and not in the breastal area), and sleep at night. Instead everything is sliding--my mouth, my boobs and my loogies.
Grandma C would be proud. Keep the sense of humor. It is what keeps us going, even if the going is sliding. :D
ReplyDeleteI just read/finished the book, ummmm, hold on a sec....... it's something like...... The 17 Second Miracle. Something like that. I enjoyed it! Kinda inspiring and goes along with our listing our tender mercies each day.
Love ya! Loogie Boogie!
Rachel
That's what the socks were for. ;-)
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